How to Feel Your Feelings

Dr. Erin Margolis Profile
Dr. Erin Margolis

Dr. Erin Margolis

Licensed Psychologist

Expertise:

Relationships, Interpersonal Trauma, Anxiety, Depression, Attachment Theory, Emotion Focused Therapy

Learn More About Dr. Margolis

  • Have you ever wondered why your therapist keeps telling you to "sit with your feelings" when that's the last thing you want to do? This course breaks down exactly what emotions are, why avoiding them backfires, and gives you a practical 7-step toolkit for processing feelings without being overwhelmed. You'll finally understand what "feeling your feelings" actually means—and walk away with concrete strategies you can use immediately.

    1. Recognize what emotions are and why your brain creates them to help you navigate life's challenges

    2. Identify the hidden costs of emotion avoidance and understand how pushing feelings away can worsen anxiety, depression, and other mental health struggles

    3. Define what "processing emotions" actually means beyond therapy buzzwords—and why it's essential for emotional wellness

    4. Apply 7 practical techniques for staying present with difficult feelings

    • Barlow, D. H. (2002). Anxiety and its disorders: The nature and treatment of anxiety and panic (2nd ed.). Guilford Press.

    • Bowlby, J. (1991). Postscript. In C. M. Parkes, J. Stevenson-Hinde, & P. Marris (Eds.), Attachment across the lifespan (pp. 293-297). Routledge.

    • Brach, T. (2003). Radical acceptance: Embracing your life with the heart of a Buddha. Bantam Books.

    • Costello, P. C. (2013). Attachment-based psychotherapy: Helping patients develop adaptive capacities. American Psychological Association. 

    • Foa, E. B., & Kozak, M. J. (1986). Emotional processing of fear: Exposure to corrective information. Psychological Bulletin, 99(1), 20–35. https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-2909.99.1.20

    • Germer, C. K., & Neff, K. D. (2013). Self-compassion in clinical practice. Journal of Clinical Psychology: In Session, 69(8), 856–867. https://doi.org/10.1002/jclp.22021

    • Grant, D. M., Wingate, L. R., Rasmussen, K. A., Davidson, C. L., Slish, M. L., Rhoades-Kerswill, S., Mills, A. C., & Judah, M. R. (2013). An examination of the reciprocal relationship between avoidance coping and symptoms of anxiety and depression. Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology, 32(8), 878–896.

    • Greenberg, L. S. (2002). Emotion-focused therapy: Coaching clients to work through their feelings. American Psychological Association.

    • Greenberg, L. S., & Pascual‐Leone, A. (2006). Emotion in psychotherapy: A practice‐friendly research review. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 62(5), 611-630.

    • Ham, J., Murty, V. P., & Helion, C. (2025). Curiosity and the regulation of affective memory. Emotion Review, 17(3), 153-167.

    • Hartman, D., & Zimberoff, D. (2004). Corrective emotional experience in the therapeutic process. Journal of Heart-Centered Therapies, 7(2), 3-35. 

    • Hayes, S. C., Luoma, J. B., Bond, F. W., Masuda, A., & Lillis, J. (2006). Acceptance and commitment therapy: Model, processes and outcomes. Behaviour Research and Therapy, 44(1), 1–25. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.brat.2005.06.006

    • Hofmann, S. G., & Hay, A. C. (2018). Rethinking avoidance: Toward a balanced approach to avoidance in treating anxiety disorders. Journal of Anxiety Disorders, 55, 14–21. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.janxdis.2018.03.004

    • Johnson, S. M. (2019). Attachment theory in practice: Emotionally focused therapy (EFT) with individuals, couples, and families. The Guilford Press.

    • Johnson, S. M., & Campbell, T. L. (2022). A primer for emotionally focused individual therapy (EFIT): Cultivating fitness and growth in every client. Routledge.

    • Kabat-Zinn, J. (2016). Mindfulness for beginners: Reclaiming the present moment—and your life. Sounds True.

    • Kuhfuß, M., Maldei, T., Hetmanek, A., & Baumann, N. (2021). Somatic experiencing – Effectiveness and key factors of a body-oriented trauma therapy: A scoping literature review. European Journal of Psychotraumatology, 12(1), 1929023. https://doi.org/10.1080/20008198.2021.1929023

    • Levine, P. A. (1997). Waking the tiger: Healing trauma. North Atlantic Books.

    • Lewis, M., Haviland‑Jones, J. M., & Barrett, L. F. (Eds.). (2008). Handbook of emotions (3rd ed.). Guilford Press.

    • Lieberman, M. D., Eisenberger, N. I., Crockett, M. J., Tom, S. M., Pfeifer, J. H., & Way, B. M. (2007). Putting feelings into words: Affect labeling disrupts amygdala activity in response to affective stimuli. Psychological Science, 18(5), 421–428. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-9280.2007.01916.x

    • Linehan, M. M. (2015). DBT skills training manual (2nd ed.). The Guilford Press.

    • Mordka, C. (2016). What are emotions? Structure and function of emotions. Studia Humana, 5(3), 29–44. https://doi.org/10.1515/sh-2016-0013

    • Neff, K., & Germer, C. (2018). The mindful self-compassion workbook: A proven way to accept yourself, build inner strength, and thrive. Guilford Publications.

    • Neff, K. D., Kirkpatrick, K. L., & Rude, S. S. (2007). Self-compassion and adaptive psychological functioning. Journal of Research in Personality, 41(1), 139-154. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jrp.2006.03.004

    • Smidt, K. E., & Suvak, M. K. (2015). A brief, but nuanced, review of emotional granularity and emotion differentiation research. Current Opinion in Psychology, 3, 48–51. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.copsyc.2015.02.007

    • Torre, J. B., & Lieberman, M. D. (2018). Putting feelings into words: Affect labeling as implicit emotion regulation. Emotion Review, 10(2), 116–124. https://doi.org/10.1177/1754073917742706

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